Good Evening Everyone

Thank you Sir Top & slave bonnie, for the Honor to speak this evening, and thank all of you for joining together in positive energy as we immerse ourselves in this Great Event.
A special thank you to my slave diamond, I am truly blessed.

 

I look forward to this event with the anticipation of New Friends, New Experiences and yet I also feel I’m coming to a family reunion. And what a family it is!!
Beyond Leather number 8....WoW --- Sir Top & slave bonnie have taken an idea and improved upon it year after year...each year seems better than the last, none of this happens by accident, and I know this as I have had the privilege of being involved with Beyond Leather since its inception.
Let me Welcome all of you Home, Welcome to Beyond Leather 8!

 

This evenings Topic will be “Changes and Changing”.

 

As I searched for tonight’s topic so many ideas came racing forward and I tried to capture each one to make a cohesive speech.
A speech that was current yet timeless, presents our History yet looks to the future, A relevant topic like Consent violations,-Great Topic. Anonymity considerations for your Career and several other topics, each equally important .... It was quite the struggle.....until

 

Fifty Shades of Gray, the Movie

 

The details of the Book or Movie are not the point. The result of the Book and Movie are.

In my opinion the Fifty Shades of Gray, is not a well written book.

I Do think the Laura Antonious’, “The Market Place Series” would be a much more relevant movie; I can see Chaz Bono as Chris. If you don’t understand the reference....you’ll need to read The Market Place Series.

 

As everyone can attest, we’re seeing more new folks at munches and entry level or local gateway events...Is that a By-product of 50 Shades of Gray?? I think so... for better or worse, here they come! I am sure the pre- 1990 S&M folks said the same thing when the computer Newbies (me included) began to meet and ask questions about Leather History, as well as the other millions of questions newbies ask.

 

I’d like to share some observations with all of you and I think some of you will begin to nod your head in agreement.

 

I began this journey in 1992. A journey that would change my life and change my life for the Better and most certainly enrich my life. A journey that never ends...not yet anyway
• I learned self discipline
• I came to have an insatiable thirst for knowledge and still do.
• Each new experience I met with awe. I could not have imagined such a lifestyle existed!
• I learned from others the value of loyalty, integrity and perseverance.
• Submission is not about being used, submission is about being of use.
• submission is not about what is done to you submission is about what you do for others
• Being a Dominant is not about Domineering
• To take responsibility and to be responsible for others.
• I realized that a completely “Vanilla” life was not for me.
• I learned to Temper BDSM with Love and Compassion as well as MORE Sadism!

 

Let me point out the obvious here..... We were all, every one of us a newbie at some point.

As we all have before you, we begin this journey perhaps filled with a preconceived Blueprint or maybe an organizational chart of just exactly how your fantasy will now become a reality..... Snap out of it!!

As we all have before you...you too will kiss a frog or two or three.
I don’t think that process will ever change. So enjoy the frog kisses, we all lived through those as well

 

Other things have changed...and have changed for the better.
• Available Recourses for Education
• Support Groups for a variety of tastes, styles and preferences.
• Kink Aware Professionals
• Political awareness/access to your representatives
• Sex Positive support groups
• More Venues/Places to play/Dungeons
• Not to mention the plentiful “hook-up” groups throughout
• A More Cohesive Community especially here in Florida

 

All of this is thanks to the internet. There is no reason beyond apathy that should prevent one from becoming active within their respective Communities. However ...Push away from the keyboard, suit up and jump in.

 

When you enter this lifestyle, each of us has a responsibility to protect each other. We have the responsibility to protect our right to express ourselves with our choice of this Lifestyle. To be able to practice the wondrous things we’ve discovered.

 

Wait!! What?? There’s work??? This is about having fun, right
Yes, but there’s work to do in order to preserve THAT right to express ourselves the way we do! Dependent upon the political and religious morays of a given election year, local or national, our freedom of self expression should never be taken for granted. At the very least vote! Know your candidate beyond the rhetoric, if an incumbent, see how they actually voted when specific issues to sex positive expression were brought forward. Knowledge is power, follow your candidate, support them if they talk the talk and walk the walk and call them on it, if they fail to do so. This is also true for our Lifestyle Community Leaders!

 

These last few years we’ve seen very exciting changes concerning personal choices, Sexual Identification and Most importantly EQUALITY!! Can any of us really imagine a government NOT supporting Equality...Not allowing same sex marriage. Not allowing Equal pay for the same job, regardless of sexual preference, Sexual Orientation or Sexual identification. A society based not upon Love and Equality, but by values based on mainstream religion.
Are you Scared yet?? Are we at the threshold of a Brave New World?? Maybe....but we must be ever vigilant these changes we have come to embrace...in whatever measure, are not ever taken away !!!...

 

We can not tolerate Inequality or deniability of our basic human right to love whom we choose or the way we choose to love!

 

Well folks, we certainly are.... living in just such a society.
Our work is never finished; we still have a long way to go before we rest, although I do see progress being made. It’s up to each one of US to help continue this progress!

 

Oh! I see no one mentioned this part of the lifestyle.?? Perhaps some research on your part on the struggles and turmoil of how we got here will help you understand the need to stand up for what you and I believe in and continue to fight for!?

 

This is a wonderful lifestyle, but also not for everyone. You’ll see folks come and go. The ones who stay to learn will energize the Lifestyle and Community and enhance their own personal journey. Let’s keep encouraging them!

 

I had a huge misconception when I first started,
I had anticipated an entire harem at my beck and call... I quickly became acutely aware that the Master/slave dynamic was a bit more complicated and yet a more fulfilling than any other relationship I had experienced thus far.

 

The 50 Shaders or the Shadies will be no different
• ....they’ll be bombarded with new enlightenment, a new empowerment... all the sensations, the information and education...just like we were, just like we continue to do
• They’ll learn the derogatory term “Velcro Collar”...just like we did
• They’ll also learn the distinct difference between polyamory and multi partners.....just like we did.
• They’ll hopefully be guided and mentored, like some of us were.
• They’ll be introduced to the good, bad and the ugly, just like we were.

 

The message here For All of our friends is....
1. “Take your time, Listen, Learn, it doesn’t matter how long you’ve been in the lifestyle....it’s what you do once you get here”
2. “Nothing is more powerful than knowledge, never stop learning” “Education is Key” go to as many classes as you can”
3. “Stop & think... Every decision you make now, can and does make a change in your life”- No where is that more important than in this lifestyle” The past is a long shadow that never really leaves. The future a Question Mark
4. “Find someone with honor and integrity, you would like to Emulate and be mentored!”
5. Resolve-The most admirable trait IMHO—Resolve is the ongoing and heartfelt reflection of priorities and values. That you will re-evaluate as the journey continues.

 

There’s a term or phrase I have used, throughout my adult life.

Know who you are and why you’re here.
Know who you are and why you’re here

Think about that for a moment.
“Know who you are”--- Some folks know who they are, some folks continue to search for who they are, and some have fleeting moments of who they are... and sadly some never do.

“Why are you here?” “Why are you here?”
Simply...
- To do your very best everyday at whatever you do!!
Well that is certainly easier said than done...and what a challenge.
- Did you do your best today?
- Were you truthful and fair in all of your daily dealings?
And most importantly
- Were you Honest with yourself?

 

Tonight as world events spin seemingly out of control, we are here safe to express ourselves. We should reflect on what have we done to serve each other and Community.

 

Do you know who you are ??
And why you’re here???

 

“The Secret of Change is to focus all of your energy, not on fighting the old, but on building the new” as stated by Socrates, one of my contemporaries.
The place to improve the world ...is first in ones own Heart and Head and Hands and then work outward from there

 

Lastly let me leave you with this...

When Sir Top introduced me, He stated my name as Master Oakman...

I wasn’t always Master Oakman, I served a Mistress and a Sir. Each of these dynamics started well but failed miserably at enhancing or maintaining a healthy relationship.

It wasn’t easy but I returned the Collar to Mistress Nicotine and Sir Smirnoff. It was time to Change. If you want to change the world, Start with yourself
Thank you...